The key to survive is denial. We deny that we're tired, we deny that we're scared, we deny how badly we want to succeed. And most importantly, we deny that we're in denial. We only see what we want to see and believe what we want to believe, and it works. We lie to ourselves so much that after a while the lies start to seem like the truth. We deny so much that we can't recognize the truth right in front of our faces.

Sometimes reality has a way of sneaking up and biting us in the ass. And when the dam bursts, all you can do is swim. The world of pretend is a cage, not a cocoon. We can only lie to ourselves for so long. We are tired, we are scared, denying it doesn't change the truth. Sooner or later we have to put aside our denial and face the world. Head on, guns blazing. De Nile. It's not just a river in Egypt, it's a freakin' ocean. So how do you keep from drowning in it?

Hang on~ Survive!

The past few days is just yet another episode of droplets from the sky for countless number of hours. The cold weather and chilling water reminds me of my trip to Mount Kinabalu last december.

Facing the wet laundry and piles of unwashed clothes in my apartment, I just wished sunshine will make it's appearance. I long for the blue skies and bright light on the mornings and afternoons. Hopefully, the weather will be ok soon as lectures will start next week.

Until then, I could only hope for the best and get ready with my cute umbrella.

Regards,
Naz

Third year, second semester is only a few weeks away. In the weeks that will follow, as always, I will be busy finishing my final year project. What a life~

The 2nd finalize draft is done and it looks something like this:



Next, I'm going to create the holding pages and work on the php coding. Hopefully, everything works out as plan.

Chow~

I'm pleased to lists 71 things that you can do to be more successful. You can choose to do them or not. If you choose not to do these things, then you have no right to complain about your problems, your problems are your fault!

1. Stop watching television.
2. Stop eating fast food.
3. Stop eating pizza and fried foods.
4. Stop driving places that you could easily walk to.
5. Read at least 1 book a month.
6. Take classes in what interests you or your vocation.
7. Work enough to support yourself, and if needed get a new job or second job to make enough to support yourself. Never stick with a job that doesn't pay enough to support yourself no matter how much you work.
8. Pay off your debts and don't go in debt. You can pay off your debts if you avoid needless expenses, such as cable, overpriced clothes, impractical decorations, unhealthy snacks, jewelry, etcetera.
9. Don't buy a car on finance, and don't buy an expensive car if a cheaper one that works is available.
10. Wake up early, and get all your work done as quickly as possible. That includes household
11. chores, as well as your employment.
12. Drink alcohol less or quit.
13. Do drugs less or quit.
14. Don't smoke cigarettes.
15. Don't eat foods with high fructose corn syrup.
16. Don't drink soda.
17. Don't eat sugary foods at all.
18. Don't drink more than 1 glass of juice per day.
19. Stand up straight and have good posture.
20. Look people in the eyes when you talk to them.
21. Smile.
22. Be polite.
23. Keep your promises.
24. Wear a watch, if you can afford it.
25. Eat breakfast.
26. If you eat cereal at any time, choose your cereal based on healthiness not tastiness.
27. Exercise at least 3 days per week.
28. Walk often.
29. Always write with correct spelling and grammar.
30. Never speak worse about a person behind their back than you do to their face. (Feel free to say
31. nicer things about a person behind their back than to their face.)
32. Don't gossip and don't have a big mouth.
33. Never judge other people harsher than you judge yourself.
34. Make New Years resolutions, but make one every day instead of every year.
35. Volunteer.
36. Forgive, but never forget.
37. Don't have skeletons in your closet.
38. Keep as few secrets as reasonably possible.
39. Despite the rule before this one, keep your friends' secrets.
40. Politely tell people that you will not betray your friends' trust, when you are asked about their secrets and such.
41. Volunteering (i.e. activism) is more important than voting. If you can do both, good for you. If you only have time for one, volunteer instead of voting. It makes more of a difference.
42. Privately question your own values.
43. Avoid questioning other people's values, especially in public.
44. Listen more than you talk.
45. Use a journal to count how many calories you consume per day.
46. Use a journal to count how many calories you burn per day.
47. If you want to lose weight, burn slightly more than you consume. If you want to gain weight, consume slightly more than you burn. If you are happy with your weight, try to burn the same amount as you consume.
48. Weigh yourself daily at the same time(s).
49. Write your daily weight down in a journal.
50. Never allow the police to search you, your car, or your belongings if you do not have something to hide.
51. Never tell other people that you think they or something they are doing is immoral or sinful.
52. Keep your moral values and religion to yourself. Use them to direct your own actions.
53. Ask people how they are often and listen to their answer.
54. Laugh at other people's jokes, but not your own.
55. Shower at least once per day.
56. Wash your hands, even if you aren't an employee.
57. Take care of the elderly, which includes spending time with them and talking to them.
58. Avoid going places where you need to be waited on.
59. Wait on yourself wherever possible.
60. Make your friends look good.
61. Avoid lying.
62. Don't pretend to be better than you are. Don't pretend to be more successful, popular, etcetera.
63. Treat other people as if they are better than they are. Treat them as if they are more successful, popular, etcetera.
64. Don't brag about your talents. Instead, surprise people with them when they just happen to be called upon.
65. Sit up straight.
66. Keep your house clean.
67. If you have either of them, keep your car and office clean.
68. Stretch daily. (I do Yoga most mornings.)
69. Dance.
70. Take dancing lessons if you could use improvement.
71. Ask other people (e.g. your friends, your co-workers, your boss, etc.) what their favorite book is, and read it. Ask their favorite song or band, and listen to it.  Ask their favorite movie, and watch it.

Extras:

1. Don't be camera shy.
2. When your alarm goes off in the morning (if you use one), don't press snooze.
3. Make a budget and follow it.

Suggestions from visitors:

1. Say "I love you" often to the people you feel this way about.
2. Always turning off lights when leaving a room, unless of course there are others are in the room. For that matter, conserving any unnecessary electricity usage is key to the future of humanity.


Regards,
Nazree

Behavioral Competencies - Questions

Teamwork/Cooperation
a.. Describe the types of teams you've been involved with. What were your roles?
b.. Describe a team experience you found rewarding.
c.. Describe a team experience you found disappointing. What would you have done to prevent this?
d.. Describe a situation where others you were working with on a project disagreed with your ideas. What did you do?
e.. Tell me about a time when you worked with a classmate or colleague who was not doing their share of the work. How did you handle it?
f.. Describe a situation in which you had to arrive at a compromise or help others to compromise. What was your role? What steps did you take? What was the result?
g.. Tell me about a time when you had to work on a team that did not get along. What happened? What role did you take? What was the result?
Customer Orientation
a.. Give me a specific example of a time when you had to address an angry customer. What was the problem and what was the outcome? How would you assess your role in defusing the situation?
b.. Give me an example of when you initiated a change in process or operations in response to customer feedback.
c.. Tell me about a marketing promotion/initiative or information dissemination you developed. How did it meet the customer's need(s)?
Commitment to Continuous Quality/Process Improvement
a.. Tell me about a suggestion you made to improve the way job processes/operations worked. What was the result?
b.. Tell me about one of your workplace improvements that another department now uses.
c.. Give me an example when you initiated a change in process or operations.
d.. In your last job, what problems did you identify that had previously been overlooked? Were changes made? Who supported the changes as a result of your ideas?
e.. Describe something you have implemented at work. What were the steps you used to implement this?

Creativity/Innovation
a.. Describe the most significant or creative presentation/idea that you developed/implemented.
b.. Describe a time when you came up with a creative solution/idea/project/report to a problem in your past work.
c.. Tell me about a time when you created a new process or program that was considered risky. What was the situation and what did you do?
d.. Can you give me an example of how you have been creative in completing your responsibilities?
e.. Can you think of a situation where innovation was required at work? What did you do in this situation?
f.. When was the last time you thought "outside the box" and how did you do it? Why?
g.. Tell me about a problem that you've solved in a unique or unusual way. What was the outcome? Were you happy or satisfied with it?
h.. Give me an example of when someone brought you a new idea that was odd or unusual. What did you do?

When? 16th December 2008
How long? 2D 1N
What do you need? Just a big heart and physical strength

I will keep readers posted on the overall climb. Until then,
Chow~

This article by Debbie Lau from Reader's Digest is worth reading, it talks about how to cope with a dying member of the family.


It was the hardest thing to hear. ''Are you sure you're ready to take him home?'' asked Dr Zee Ying Kiat, the ward doctor at the National University Hospital Singapore, with deep concern. I didn't understand him at first. I thought he wanted to know if my family had the right setup to care for my Dad at home. Then it hit me, what Dr Zee was really asking was if we were prepared to bring Dad home to die.

My father, a 70-year-old retiree, had been suffering quietly for a couple of months. He was visibly losing weight but no-one had thought much of it since he never complained of any health problems, other than irritable bowel syndrome. It was only when my Mum revealed that there was blood in his stool that my sister and I insisted he see a doctor immediately.

That day in June 2007, our worst fears were confirmed. Dad had colorectal cancer and the size of the tumour indicated the cancer was in an advanced stage.

The weeks that followed were a whirlwind of doctor's appointments, MRI scans, blood tests and treatment options. We then discovered the cancer had also spread to his liver and pancreas. The prognosis was grim, but because doctors kept recommending treatment options, we were hopeful.
Caring for Dad was manageable at first. At home, Mum was his main caregiver and my siblings and I took turns to take him from home for his daily radiotherapy appointments. But my Dad's condition was deteriorating fast.

At first he was able to walk into the radiotherapy treatment room himself, but within a week he was using a wheelchair. He was constantly tired and so frail that he'd shiver at the slightest drop in temperature. We went everywhere with blankets and heat packs. By the second week of treatment, he was so emaciated that he was wheeled in on a gurney for radiotherapy. He lost his appetite and dropped to a mere 40 kilograms. He had to be hospitalised in order to complete the treatment.

My elder brother, younger sister and I took turns to visit Dad each morning before going to work knowing he would want to see a familiar face when he woke up.

One morning, my brother discovered Dad with his right wrist bandaged. According to the duty nurse, he'd ripped off his IV drip in the middle of the night, causing bleeding. He would wake up throughout the night agitated and disorientated, and at times didn't seem to realise he was in hospital. He hated being there and would plead with us to take him home.

Alhamdulillah, my internship with BAG Networks finally came to its end on the 21st of November 2008 and I just saw my grades at the UNIMAS portal. I'm proud to say, I passed!

While interning at BAG Networks, I was exposed to a lot of things from providing technical support for their clients, research works, administrative tasks and adding job aids documentation to the system front page, etc. These experiences have been an eye opener and

Perhaps, the most enjoyable project that I enjoyed doing there is the company web site revamped project using the SilverStripe CMS MVC framework, which I'm pleased to show below:



Figure 1.0:
The Home Page for the new web site.

 

Figure 2.0:
One of the individual main page (Parent Page).

 

Figure 3.0:
The child page of the parent page.

 

Figure 4.0:
The search function for the web site.

 

Figure 5.0:
The search results page.

 

Figure 6.0:
The Admin login interface.

 

Figure 7.0:
This is how the SilverStripe Content Editor looks like.

 

Figure 8.0:
This is how easy it is to edit the content. A WYSIWYG editor at your disposal.

 

Figure 9.0:
You also have the option to select the page type for the web site.

What I like about the SilverStripe Template engine is that it allows total freedom to customize the layout of our web site with CSS and HTML. While the PHP MVC Framework is also easy to use with wide documentation coverage. It sure is a CMS that will web programmers would enjoy using. For more details on the CMS. You can visit www.silverstripe.com and browse through it's community links. You'll be amazed of the level of support they provide.

Cheers.
Nazree

*Naz happily eating his pizza

A few days ago, i had sungkai at Primo Pizza Hut Mall branch with my colleagues Ash and Naz. At first, we thought that not many people would break their fast there but we were wrong about that.. It was very packed therefore we have to break our fast somewhere else first. So we went up to the foodcourt and we didnt get any seats.. it was fully occupied
And then, we had no choice but to go to West Street Cafe.. we relax for a while till 7pm and then went down again to the Primo. Finally there was one table available for us.
So actually we were helping Ash out to perform a task which was to assess the customer service and quality of the premises and it turned out well.. i don't know why but since we came into the Primo, we were welcomed and treated very well.
We had Tuna Pizza and Beef Lasagnia and it was marvelous.. Just look at Naz expression while he's enjoying his pizza.I hope he don't mind me posting his pictures. (Selamat Hari Raya Bro... Jangan marah ah*). Anyway, we blew our undercover when we showed them the vouchers. Each of them went panic-ing.. HUHU

Naz truly feeling the pizza... lol

ash, the waiter and naz ..

seriously they were shocked when they found out

After Primo, we went to Red Canopy Cafe in Batu Bersurat to complete our work. Fuh.. Finally its done. Well im going to update about it again soon..

I thought I'd share this with my readers:

I need you. I can’t stop thinking about you. Day and night. You are here with me even when you aren’t. I sleep cuddling with my blanket, wishing it were you. Wishing this love were guilt free. Wishing you felt the same about me so I could be near you forever. I listen to your favorite radio station and, I don’t even know why, but, it makes me feel closer to you. Every time I see you, I ache for you even more, if possible. My mind tells me no to see you again unless I can see you all the time because it hurts to much to say goodbye. But my heart tells me that I can’t get enough of you. Every time I am near you, one would think that the yearning to be close to you would come to a hiatus, but it doesn’t. The desire to be closer to you just makes me want to hold you to my chest so you can listen to my heart as it cries your name and tells you of the miserable days and the lonely nights spent without you. My eyes soak you up when they see you and I have to force them to look at you the way a friend would or look away altogether. I hope, in vain, that, with time, the ache will dull and fade. But time has betrayed me because with time I want you more. Every detail about you has me intrigued, captivated, mesmerized if you will. Surprised doesn’t even begin to express the way I feel about how good you are. You never fail to surprise me by being the many faceted enigma that you are. What do I call you? What do you call someone that is everything to you, and yet nothing to you at the same time? You are everything to me because I love you. Yet you are nothing to me because I can never let on the depth of my affection for you. The word friend is not easy to swallow. I don’t want to just be friends, I’m not happy with that title. Then, what could I say I am to you? I’m way past the friendship phrase. I always wonder what would happen if I told you how I feel. But we’re stuck somewhere between being friends and being more because I fear you’d deny me should I tell you how I feel Only fear stands in the way. But, if I can’t have you as a love, I must at least be able to keep you as a friend. My fear is that you will cut all ties should I tell you and you not feel the same. So, today I will sit over here and you will sit over there and I will make sure my eyes don’t reflect the love and agony directed at you. And tonight I will go to bed and have the same dream as always In these dreams we are at the beach. You are in the water and I am standing on the pier. I’m thinking about jumping off into the deep, but I’m scared. And when I jump off you will be in the water. You can catch me, if you want, or let me drown. I jump, my eyes closed, and hit the water. You can catch me. Sinking. I feel your arms wrap around me, lovingly pulling me up to breathe. When I get to the surface I look into your eyes and see that we have been hiding the same things all along. We swim off together into the sunset. But in the real world, the sun is setting and I’m alone here in bed. Wondering if your heart is crying the same things as mine is tonight. So tonight, I will wait here, my tears soaking into the pillow again. Too scared to jump. I know in the morning, I’ll wake up to having to pretend to only love you as a friend would for another day. If I should decide to jump, would you catch me?

Regards,

Naz

Hey guys... Sorry for not updating this blog ever since my last entry. The truth is I am really really super busy with my schedule now.

*Gosh*, it's been more than 20 days since I submit my last post. Well, I have a concrete reason for that. My life right now revolves around the course that I'm taking at the moment. It's called the Sun Certified Java Programmer or better acronymed as 'SCJP'. This course was introduced by my faculty as part of the industry professional certification, which aims at increasing it's undergrad's competitive edge in the current demanding market.

The exam will be in the form of an electronic MCQ questions. But don't let the MCQ word fool you. This exam is seriously tricky and challenging. Well, duh! Ofcourse I have to expect those kinda questions, since this is industry based certification. Can't wait for this to end, so I can have a temporary break before my Industrial Training this coming June. Oh yea, about that, I've already made up my mind to go to BAG Networks instead, since they replied to my application first. I'm definitely someone who believes in the first metaphor. My english teacher likes to say this: The "first is always the best". I think she means it literally.

Speaking of that, I really have to go now. My eyes have started sending me the rest signal. I need to rejuvenate myself for this morning's lecture. So, until then...

After several weeks of lectures, tutorials and labs sessions, my final end of semester exam starts officially on the 22nd of April 2008. With so much to catchup, I'm working in overdrive mode to do my revision.

Just feel like showing the pictures taken during the exam week. Wish me luck guys.. You know I need it~

This scene was taken after my BM exam at the East Campus. Pictures showing the UNIMAS bus at the Depot.

This is the scene taken several minutes before the IS Lab exam starts.

5 more minutes to countdown -

1 minute before the exam starts

Tomorrow's the deadline to submit my FYP1. As much as I'd like to get it completed on time, I think i understimated my own strength. There are times, when you just need to put down the pen and channel your mind to something else for a while.

So, I went to play a game of bowling at my Uni's bowling centre. The very first time, I've ever used the facility provided. The fees are much cheaper compared to the charges in Brunei. It's like RM3.00 for a game and RM1 for shoe rental. In Brunei, it's B$5.00, if i'm not mistaken. So, if you convert RM3.00 to Brunei Dollars, you'll get B$1.20.. One nasi katok and one ice-cream panjang... Haha... Seriously, cheap..

There's also a karaoke box, similar to the ones at the Mall. One song cost around RM1.50. I played two rounds of bowling, sang 1 song and just about 30 minutes ago, I went for the Sports Presentation for my University. Overall, it was fun.. With a calm mind now, I think I better get started with the FYP1. Chow..

Today was my last class for EPP. Ms. Grace went through all the possible list of questions that will be asked during the final exams. At the end of the class, it was all emotional when she told us that she is going to miss our presence and how we are the best students so far she ever taught. Judging from her tone, I know she meant every word. Anyway, we ended the class with a Hi-Tea session to show our appreciation for her guidance and her well taught lesson.

All the best to Ms. Grace, hope she can go through her MBA course and succeed in life.

Thanks for everything~

Cheers

This semester I took the English for Professional Purpose course at the Centre for Language Studies. Anyway, this course focuses on the use of the English for office environment.. Writing letters, memos, reports, conduct a meeting etc.

One of the best time I had in this class was when we did our Meeting role play, just last Thursday. Anyway, I enjoyed the class, thanks to the EPP instructor, Ms. Grace and the friends I meet there. They really gave me a good time.

Some of the pictures taken during the meeting role play last Thursday.

Cheers,

Just feel like showing the artwork from my uni's art faculty

After what I would call a series of sleepless nights, I finally manage to complete the UVRS Project. What put me on hold was that our Lecturer Puan Rosita want us to add more function to the Administrator and Student's Workspace.

Anyway, I feel like previewing the end result here and you decide:

The Startup-Page of the System: Two options - Login as Admin or Student

The Login Page for Administrator

The Admin's Workspace. There are 5 functions included for the Admin to choose from.

Anyway, the project is about simplifying the vehicle registration status for students in UNIMAS. By computerising the registration process, we will be able to process the application quicker and efficiently manage the collected data from applicants.

Cheers,

Nazree

Last week 22nd March 2008, I had a fun time at Pandan Beach. The purpose of this outing is to meet the IS Programme juniors. I must say, they've done a great job in organizing the activities that day. Kudos to Vishnu and his team.

As always, pictures taken from the trip:

Scene 1: Waiting for the Bus @ 7am

Scene 2: Arriving at Lundu - 1.5 hours from UNIMAS

Scene 3: 20 minutes from reaching the Pandan Beach, some of the dangerous crossing along the way.

Scene 4: The beautiful scenery of Pandan Beach and our chill area.

Scene 5: Making memories with my juniors and a group photo of IS students.

Scene 6: Again with my juniors.

Cheers,

That's all for this week.

It's been raining a lot these few days and when it shines, it's shines so bright and it gets a lot hotter. Well, I guess what I'm trying to say is, I haven't seen a rainbow in quite a while.

After my BM class last friday, I saw the best rainbow ever since my last encounter. Showing you how it looks like in this entry and you decide:

Left: The rainbow just above my apartment

Right: The CLS Building, where I took my BM class.

That's all for this week folks~

Cheers~